She gave me a kiss on the cheek. I carried her things down to the plane, and told her good-bye as she climbed on board. It was starting to snow by this time, as Gene gunned his engine. I saw Jan looking out the window. All I could think of was why did I let her get on that plane and leave me? I wanted her, and it hurt to see her go. I was walking back to the lodge as the plane disappeared out of sight. As I opened the door, I was hearing Mayday, Mayday on the radio, I recognized the voice as Gene’s and my heart sunk. The tower was talking to him. He said he was not quite to Moose Jaw Pass, and his carburetor was icing up. ‘Were losing altitude I don’t think we’re going to make it. We’re going in, Oh! Sh…’ Silence, the tower was calling, but there was no answer. I called the tower. They said they were socked in from the storm and there would be no help coming. It was snowing heavily by now. I guess I was the only help, there was, I brought up the snowmobile and hooked on the sled. " Alright, baby, anything you want." We went into his den and sat in easy chairs smoking cigarettes and enjoying the silence. At last he started to talk. I wasn't listening too closely. Being alone with him set my nerves on edge. I thought of Mum and her brother playing doctors upstairs, of the other brush Dad and I had had, of tomorrow's wedding, and how badly I wanted to fuck my father. If I could have him I would be satisfied! But he was in one chair and I was in the other. What was worse, he was babbling on about the birds and the bees while I was thinking about the blow job I'd given him!"Daddy, please!" I burst out. "You know that that's all old stuff! I want you, I don't care what you think about that, I just want to make love with you once more before I settle down. Please, let's do it now or we never will!" The words rang through the study over and over as if to haunt me. My father was in the process of lighting another cigarette and I wondered if he had heard me. "Daddy?".
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